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Friday, March 12th, 2004
1:19 am - oh my gawd, i'm like SO wasted
How incredibly dumb that Sean Penn won for Best Actor. Like Jeff Spicoli even begins to match up to Clay Easton. DUH. And just because he could hit himself in the head with checkered vans and marry Madonna he thinks he's so freaking great. Pssh, like who *didn't* have a turn at Madonna (although really, that Guy Ritchie isn't too bad; I suspect it's the accent.)

Anyway I have a meeting with Jonathan Silverman's people at The Ivy. Well, not so much the Ivy as this really nice little Mexican place down the road. It's totally unknown but you can tell it's going to be the next Spago. But it's close enough to the Ivy that's it's easier to just meet there... So I've got to go condition. Ciao.

current mood: annoyed

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Monday, November 24th, 2003
4:02 pm - i'm turning into a chubby hubby!
Winter depresses me so much. Ever since I found out I was allergic to turkey Thanksgiving has been nothing but an ordeal. Richard Roeper made fun of me in my new movie. I have been eating to comfort myself and have woefully gone off of the macrobiotic diet a few times in the past couple of days. I thought my friends Ben and Jerry would fix me but instead I can't fit into my new jeans from Banana Republic.

This is going to be a long winter. Well, at least I'm not Craig Sheffer.



current mood: depressed

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Monday, November 10th, 2003
1:58 am - Pretty In The Pink, One In The Stink
Today I went to the Ivy to grab a bite to eat and talk with Molly about some scripts I've been reading that further delves into our Pretty In Pink relationship.

The bitch stood me up.

Me, ANDREW FUCKING MCCARTHY! Can you imagine??? I called her publicist, who informed me she's come down with a rare form of STD, found only in the duckbilled platypus. Come to find out, she got it from Sean Connery, who she slept with in a poor attempt to become the latest Bond girl. Pshaw. C'mon, Moll...You should have just blown that Brosnan guy! Sean Connery isn't even James Bond anymore!!! I mean, when I wanted to be in Pretty In Pink, did I drop my trousers and bend over for George Lucas? NO! I opened my mouth and started hoovering John Hughes! Word got around Hollywood what a great "actor" I was and before I could say "Ew, not in my eye!" I had landed the Weekend At Bernie's role. Coincidence? I think not.

Long story short, Miss Molly Ringworm's diseased self won't be fit to act for the next 14 months. This leaves me few options to entertian. I've been thinking about developing the role of Blaine a bit more, and turning it into a more adult-themed film. I've had several ideas pitched at me, and one script in particular, My Pink Is Pretty, has caught my eye. I think for this part I'd have to ditch the honey highlights and go for a darker, redder hue. Perhaps accented by some deep chestnut lowlights? I don't know...do any of you fans have any thoughts on the matter?

current mood: drained

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Thursday, November 6th, 2003
5:03 pm
hey guys! i joined the bratpack community! Let the adoration begin!

current mood: loved

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3:59 pm
I was going to go to Orso today with Mare Winningham, who's been pretty broken up about that show she was in being canceled--what was it called? The Brotherhood of something or other? Who cares. Anyway, the point is, we were on our way and guess who we ran into--fucking Vincent D'Onofrio, that son of a bitch. Those Law and Order shows are some of the biggest shows on TV and that big-headed prick got me fired. Whatever. I'm too good for Criminal Intent anyway. I need to get on Special Victims Unit and cozy up to that chick with the short hair. Anyway, so D'Ouchebagio was all like, "long time, no see, Blane," and Mare was all like "Get a life, My Cousin Vinny," and I just wanted to get out of there. I would have kicked his ass but I'm not going to make a scene or whatever just to prove I'm more of a man than he is. Dickwad.

So, yeah. We went to Orso and they saw Mare and were all like "Right this way, Miss Cunningham." I think they didn't know who I was because I got those honey-brown highlights and damn, do I look good. Seriously. Dick Wolf is going to come crying to me with a lead on Law and Order and I'll be all like, "No way, The Drewcifer has bigger plans." Told Mare that I think Carol is cheating on me, but she was too broken up about that show. Whatever, it was lame. It's only CBS. Just like Jon Crybaby's sitcom and that stupid sitcom Jami Gertz is in. God, I would never lower myself to the level of doing a sitcom. I guess that's what desperation will do to you. And in Jon Crybaby's case, desperation and a small penis.

current mood: distressed

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Wednesday, November 5th, 2003
7:32 pm - Fuck you, Ducky!
Molly Ringwald and I have been talking to producers about making a sequel to Pretty In Pink...we're both really excited about it. The title is tentatively set as Pretty in White and follows us as we make plans to get married. The surprising twist??? Ducky comes back as a multimillionaire, after a long-lost uncle died and left him $427 million dollars. Will he get the girl? Or will Molly stay true to our high school love?

It's perfect. The script, the director, my sexy body...I was even thinking about taking my coif to a lighter shade of brown...perhaps with honey-colored highlights? I think it would really boost my character's credibility. What do you all think???

Here's the catch: John Cryer thinks he's hot shit now that he's got that sitcom with Charlie Sheen, who just happens to be the second biggest douchebag in Hollywood (next to Ashton Kutcher). Anyway, Charles thinks he's in charge, and has been filling John Crybaby's head full of possible script changes. Basically, this time around, HE wants the girl. You know what i have to say to that??? Over my dead body, Johnny Boy!

I have now worked myself up in a tizzy. Time to take a relaxing trip to Banana Republic to clear my head of this nonsense.

current mood: distressed

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